What's Happening At ADRhub.com






ADRhub.com recommends you check out the latest issue of the the Journal of Conflictology. The new issue includes:
*The opening article by Neuroscientist David Bueno presents a series of new data on the influence of genes on aggressive behaviour.
* Craig Zelizer develops ananalytical model regarding the role of humor in peacebuilding in dividedsocieties.
* Stean Auguste Nkumb Tshiband engages in a discussion of civilian peacekeeping as contrasted to multidimensionalpeacekeeping based on both practical and theoretical insights
* In her article “Reciprocal recognition as a means of peaceful conflict transformation”, Sonia ParĂ­s makes a claim for nonviolentconflict settlement based on Axel Honneth’s theory of recognition
* The section PIONEERS is this time dedicated to the non-violent resistance of two Maori chiefs in 19th century New Zealand
[Read More Here]






Wiki Leaks- Thoughts?
Lisa Dagerman
- Just checking in and wondering what everyone thinks about the Wikileaks that are in the news today. Personally, I find it to be a benefit to our profession, but a determint to our universe. What do you think??
[
4 comments]










What can North Korea teach us about the workplace?
Eric Cissell-
Daniel Rose is a busi­ness and
man­age­ment con­sul­tant who shares some of his thoughts on his personal blog. You can find Daniel's blog [here].His most recent post, "What can North Korea teach us about the workplace?," shared an important thought on how "...North Korea are collectively behaving like a workplace bully. They don’t want to share resources, or even com­mu­ni­cate with col­leagues at all. At times, they become down­right hos­tile, over what seems to be very little."
[
Read More]








Unexpected Leadership Lessons: Effectiveness Through Humility & Common Ground


Jeff Thompson- In “Four Lesson’s in Adaptive Leadership” Professor Michael Useem makes the case that the highly competitive and unpredictable environments encountered in many organizational settings present leadership challenges not unlike that found on the battlefield.


[Read More]







A Blog On Blogging
Matthew J. Starman- In the many discussions I had during the holiday, the fact that I have been blogging for ADRhub came up multiple times. Some were surprised, others thought it was cool. I did however get one unified reaction, "I could never do that."
[
Read More]





More News, Articles & Jobs


ADRhub.com Member Spotlight


U of Maryland, Professor ADR


Coaching With Compassion Can "Light Up" Human Thoughts


Ombuds Job Posting: Internet Corporation for Assigned Names and Numbers


CIArb Launches Major Survey into Costs of International Arbitration

read more "What's Happening At ADRhub.com"

Unexpected Leadership Lessons: Effectiveness Through Humility & Common Ground

Yet another reason to be on Twitter (follow me @ADRhub and @mediatorjeff)- I came across a retweet by conflict coach Cinnie Noble (@CINERGYCoaching) who posted the following link below. It is from David Holzmer's (@DavidHolzmer) blog and it talks about leadership qualities. For those mediators who work 'beyond neutrality' and others who work in conflict resolution, the following could be of interest:

In “Four Lesson’s in Adaptive Leadership” Professor Michael Useem makes the case that the highly competitive and unpredictable environments encountered in many organizational settings present leadership challenges not unlike that found on the battlefield.

...4 principles of leadership that are applicable under almost any conditions:

Meet The Troops: Creating a personal link is crucial to leading people through challenging times.

Make Decisions: Making good and timely calls is the crux of responsibility in a leadership position.

Focus on Mission: Establish a common purpose, support those who help, and avoid eschew personal gain.

Convey Strategic Intent: Make objectives clear, but avoid micromanaging those who will execute on them.

Read the full blog postings HERE.

Enjoy!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad
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Coaching With Compassion Can "light Up" Human Thoughts


Thanks to @davidrock101 I came across the following article:

From Sify.com:
Researchers at Case Western Reserve University have found that people respond much better to a coach they find inspiring and who shows compassion for them, rather than one who they perceive to be judging them.

"We're trying to activate the parts of the brain that would lead a person to consider possibilities. We believe that would lead to more learning. By considering these possibilities we facilitate learning," said Richard Boyatzis, distinguished university professor, and professor of organizational behaviour, cognitive science and psychology.

..."Students tended to activate the areas associated with visioning more with the compassionate coach, even when the topics they were thinking about weren't so positive," Jack said of the results.

From Physorg.com (with a video at this link)
Internally funded research at Case Western Reserve has documented reactions in the human brain to compassionate and critical coaching methods. The results start to reveal the mechanisms by which learning can be enhanced through coaching with compassion (a method that emphasizes the coached individual’s own goals).

Neural Signatures of Inspirational Mentoring: The researchers are studying neural responses to different styles of coaching with the goal of improving learning outcomes.

Method: Undergraduate students interacted with two coaches, and later while in the brain scanner responded to questions requiring recall of those coaches. The left and right hemispheres of the brain are seen colored according to whether there was more activity in response to the compassionate coach, who evokes the positive emotional attractor, or the standard coach, who evokes the negative emotional attractor.

Analysis: More brain activity was seen in the positive condition, particularly in higher visual and auditory areas associated with imagery.

-- Brain areas shown by pink spheres showed a more complex pattern, which related to the emotional content of the questions. However, the majority of brain areas identified were positive visioning foci.

-- The pattern for positive visioning foci is shown in the graph. These areas showed consistently more activity for more positive conditions: while the coach was posing the question, while the student responded, and while the coach thanked the student for responding.

-- Positive visioning areas are thought to reflect the greater cognitive and perceptual openness that comes from being encouraged to connect with a vision that inspires you, as opposed to the defensiveness caused by the sense you are being judged or pressured to conform to externally imposed goals.
So, coaches and consultants (and mediators who work beyond just in neutral capacities!), how does this fit into your coaching work?
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"What's Happening at ADRhub.com?"


John C. Turley- There are two lessons to be learned from this experience. The first lesson validates the need for the mediator to be flexible and to sense when it is appropriate to assume the roles of the ally, strategist, coach or organizer to help the parties to recognize the value of collaborative team work for a common goal. The second lesson learned is to have a BATNA, a meeting plan to get to yes, and an agreed upon team negotiation strategy in hand prior to any important session.





Lynsee Swisher

Lynsee, a recent graduate of Creighton's Werner Institute, is an ADR professional with the Dispute Resolution Center of Kitsap County, in Washington. She is involved with ADR training, consulting, conflict coaching, as well as an advocate for family with autism.




Susan M. Diehl- ...Living your core values is more than putting a poster on the office wall, or holding asession to “embed” the values in the organization. Indeed, even if youare successful in aligning your employees around the values of yourorganization, it only takes one misstep (like the one above) to unwindall the good work that the organization has done to create thatalignment. Put simply, the organization is just one behavior away fromdestroying a positive reputation that may have taken years to build.So, how can an organization ensure that it is walking the talkconsistently?...
[Read More] 5 Comments



Jeff Thompson- ...What I noticed right away and was simply astounded by was his posture. For mediators, ombudsman and conflict coaches, I often tell people to develop immediacy and rapport, one thing you should ALWAYS do (hey, I rarely use the word 'always') is face them. Especially while another person is talking, if you want to show you care and are interested, face them! Ditto for when you are speaking. Think about, seriously, close your eyes or just picture to yourself while acting as a mediator, ombudsman or coach and think- do you you face the person? Think now how would you feel if you were the client or party member and the mediator did not face you while he/she spoke and while you listened...
[
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Matthew J. Starman- ...As I search for hints and suggestions to get in field, I am bombarded with this lack luster advice, “Don’t quit your day job.” You mean to tell me after I have experienced the power of mediation, and chomping at the bit to get out and bring the power to the people I won’t have a line of people waiting for me to change their life? It was quite a sobering feeling, one I’m sure many of you have felt.

[Read More] 2 comments
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Not Facing People Makes Them Comfortable??

I went the other day to an espresso bar (yes, I am a full-on coffee/espresso snob now!) and noticed something that I had to blog on. Being the massive observer of body language and nonverbal communication that I claim to be, I noticed the two people next to me.

they were both seated next to me, and I was standing at a high table drinking my cortado. I noticed two papers on their table, and while watching them I was thinking that these two do not really seem to know each other. I was able to see on the table one of the papers, facing the gentleman, was the woman's resume.

For those thinking, "Wow, I love people-watching but always feel like I will get caught, how does Jeff do it?" Sorry but this is not a tutorial on how to people-watch! Perhaps in a future blog posting I will go over my stealth detective skills and how they are used in people-watching.

So, back to the story. The woman I now determined was there on a job interview and the gentleman was the one conducting the interview. Right away I was thinking how her body language and gestures were very conservative- she was sitting upright, limited hand gestures as well as few facial cues.

The gentleman on the other hand was shocking me. Yes, I still get shocked. What I noticed right away and was simply astounded by was his posture. For mediators, ombudsman and conflict coaches, I often tell people to develop immediacy and rapport, one thing you should ALWAYS do (hey, I rarely use the word 'always') is face them. Especially while another person is talking, if you want to show you care and are interested, face them! Ditto for when you are speaking.

Think about, seriously, close your eyes or just picture to yourself while acting as a mediator, ombudsman or coach and think- do you you face the person? Think now how would you feel if you were the client or party member and the mediator did not face you while he/she spoke and while you listened. Now picture the person turned sideways and the only occasional movement was crossing their legs. Crossing your legs, for men, I say often signifies someone is confident, comfortable enough and relaxed.

Let's go back to the gentleman conducting the interview now. I snapped this photo discretely (they did not notice) on my mobile phone as I was completely shocked at how the entire time I was there, he sat sideways. Occasionally he crossed his legs. HE NEVER FACED HER directly.

Now as if this was not shocking enough a few days later I went through my nonverbal communication books to quote from them for this post about how facing a person (ask yourself where your belly button is facing) and guess what I found? I found the following from a book I often recommend to people who are interested in an introduction to body language.

On page 359 of "The Definitive Book of Body Language" by Allan and Barbara Pease, they state the following:

When you position your body 45 degrees away from the other person, you take the pressure off the interview. This is an excellent position from which to ask delicate pr embarrassing questions, encouraging more open answers to your questions without them feeling as if they are being pressured.
Wow, again shocking. I think shocking at least. My first response to this is just because something is written in a book (or an instructor or trainer tells you) does not means (edit: fixed typo) it is the truth or right. Let me add at this moment I could be completely wrong and Allan and Barbara could be right. All I am saying is I think, based on my own experiences and the research I have read (see below) and been involved in personally is this is totally off.

I really look forward to feedback from everyone and their thoughts on this.

Enjoy!

------
Whether you face someone directly, at an angle, or literally give them the "cold shoulder", your body angle communicates more or less immediacy. People are interpersonnally cold, unavailable, and uninvolved in side-to-side and back-to-back positions... one of the main ways people increase involvement and immediacy is to assume a more direct body orientation (Coker & Burgoon, 1987). Andersen, Peter A. Nonverbal Communication: Forms and Functions.

"The Degree to which someone's legs and shoulders face the direction of someone else indicates the level of liking or the status of that person. The more someone's body orientation is toward you, the better your chances that the other person has a positive attitude about you. Goman, Carol Kinsey, The Nonverbal Advantange, page 35.

The more time doctors spend with their bodies oriented toward patients, the more that patients are satisfied with doctors, and the more medical information that patients understand/retain (Larsen & Smith, 1981). Guerrero, Laura K. and Michael L. Hecht, The Nonverbal Communication Reader.
read more "Not Facing People Makes Them Comfortable??"

"What's Happening" At ADRhub.com 11.16.10



Plan to Require Mediation Stirs up State Bar‏
A proposal to require lawyers to notify their clients that disputes can be settled through mediation as well as litigation has stirred considerable opposition within the New York StateBar Association.
A resolution of the group's Dispute Resolution Section supporting the requirement was abruptly taken off of the House of Delegates' agenda Saturday after several objections were raised.
...Simeon H. Baum, a mediation proponent who was to have presented the notification proposal to the House of Delegates, said in an interview Wednesday that it is "an open question" whether the resolution can be salvaged.
[Read More]







MEMBER SPOTLIGHT: Arnold Zeman
One of the primary strengths of ADRhub.com is the network of members from such diverse backgrounds. ADRhub.com now includes academics, practitioners, scholars, professionals, students, 'newbies,' and those interested in getting involved in Alternative Dispute Resolution (ADR).
...Arnold Zeman is a transformative mediator with a private practice in family mediation in Ottawa, Canada.
[Read the Full Q&A With Arnold Zeman by Eric Cissell here]







Idea of the Day: Foreclosure Mediation Programs Are Necessary

Bank of America Corp. and Ally Financial Inc., two of our nation’s largest home mortgage lenders, announced last week that that they would resume active foreclosures in 23 so-called judicial foreclosure states, or those states where foreclosures move through the courts.

...Instead, jurisdictions and the federal government should implement foreclosure mediation programs so that responsible homeowners and their lenders or mortgage servicers have at least one chance prior toforeclosure to review the documentation and ensure the foreclosure is both legal and appropriate. [Read More]








School Based Conflict Resolution Group

Featured Program: Lowell Highschool

Recently, I had the pleasure of speaking with Yvette Thomas, the program director of the Lowell High School Peer Mediation Program. The program was implemented in 1991 and receives private funding from a local community college and the school department.

[Read More]







Episode #9- ABC's of Conflict Resolution by Vickie Pynchon

Join host Jeff Thompson and mediator and author, Victoria Pynchon (Check out Settle It Now Dispute Resolution, Negotiation Law Blog, and She Negotiates).

She discusses her new book, The ABC's of Conflict Resolution. Find out what the book is all about, how it can help you and your clients/parties to mediation.

[More On The Series Here] [Visit The Blog] [Episode #9 Here]



More News, Events, Jobs

CIVIL Collaborative Practice 2-day Training "Beyond Just Divorce"

Walk the Talk - Best Practices on the Road to Automatic Foreclosure Mediation

Upcoming Basic Mediation Trainings in NYC Area

(Video) Mediation Success Story by Jerry Slusky

(Video) ODR LATINOAMERICA Cyberweek 2010 Summary Spanish

DC and NYC Part-Time PeaceMover Facilitator Positions, Spring 2011

A New Book on Transformative Mediation

Less than 20% of workforce trust HR in dispute resolution
read more ""What's Happening" At ADRhub.com 11.16.10"

Episode #9- ABC's of Conflict Resolution

http://abcsofconflict.com/
Find more music like this on ADRhub Werner Institute



Episode #9


The ABC's of Conflict Resolution





Join host Jeff Thompson and mediator and author, Victoria Pynchon (Check out Settle It Now Dispute Resolution, Negotiation Law Blog, and She Negotiates). She discusses her new book, The ABC's of Conflict Resolution. Find out what the book is all about, how it can help you and your clients/parties to mediation.






Subscribe to the new series by click the image below:



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Much fuss about the forum: Noam Ebner goes to Cyberweek (again!)


Noam Ebner once again provides us a guest posting. He participated in a week-long conference with hundreds of other people, from his armchair at home, and wants to share...

Sitting (well - really standing up, singing and Whooo-ing) while Paul McCartney played Tel Aviv last year, I had some of those magical rock-concert moments. You know those moments - you suddenly feel very aware that it’s not just you and the performer and the music, but it’s also the hundreds or thousands of people around you (50,000, in this case), straining to hear the same words or screaming them out together with you, that make the experience so special. It’s as if the venue itself, or the air connecting everyone in it, suddenly becomes alive.

Maybe it’s the fact that the first ODR conference I attended was in Liverpool that brings this analogy to my mind (in one of those contagious trends, every speaker tried to open his or her talk with a line from a Beatles song. Some were better than others). Or, maybe I just need to get out more often. One way or another, I had quite a few of those moments last week, as I participated in Cyberweek, the annual online conference on Online Dispute Resolution. There’s nothing like a good show combined with the feeling of a vibrant, lively community. For a few days, it really did feel as if the web was alive with people, thoughts, ideas and connections.


I’ve participated in Cyberweek for the past six or seven years, always excited to participate in this conference which really mirrors the nature of its content – an area of dispute resolution that anyone can take part in, regardless of geographical or financial limitations, and participate in pushing a constantly expanding envelope. This year it was my good fortune to be on the organizing side, as Cyberweek was hosted on ADRHub.com, the web platform set up by The Werner Institute for Negotiation and Dispute Resolution at Creighton University’s School of Law. Werner co-organized Cyberweek together with the conference’s long-standing primary organizer, The National Center for Technology and Dispute Resolution (NCTDR) ,and a committee including Ethan Katsh, Dan Rainey, Colin Rule, Jeff Thompson, Alberto Elisavetsky, Jeff Aresty, Bryan Hanson and I tried to walk the ODR talk, convening and organizing online, across timelines and borders.


In addition to satisfying my own personal Jones-ing for ODR schmooze, organizing this conference served higher goals. The Werner Institute offers a masters degree program in negotiation and dispute resolution, in both a traditional, on-campus format and in an online format. The online format is the only graduate degree in the world to include a course on ODR (taught by Dan Rainey) as a required, core course – fitting the forum to the fuss, and the fuss to the forum, so to speak, in many ways. In addition to showing our commitment to ODR education through hosting Cyberweek, we also aimed to give our online students the experience (which is usually reserved for campus-based students) of their department hosting an international conference - allowing them exposure to, and contact with, leading figures in the field, and others who intend to be. This last was one of the reasons for setting up ADRHub as a networking and resource site with live videoconferences and webinars as a core part of its content. After Cyberweek, I can definitely say: Stay tuned for the next episode of ‘Online Conferences’ at ADRHub – we are certainly going to host more of them!



So, who showed up at Cyberweek?


The surprising thing is, that we don’t know! Sure, we know that 270 people signed up at the Cyberweek registration site, and that about half that number of people were active participants in the discussion forums. However, we also know that people checked in to Cyberweek from over 1500 IP addresses, so even assuming that some people used multiple computers or had dynamic IPs, the sum total of people who registered, showed up, checked in, posted, viewed, spoke up or just lurked at Cyberweek remains an unknown, yet undeniably large, number.


However – that is only half the picture! Cyberweek was organized as a bilingual event, with the Spanish-language section of the event masterminded and coordinated by Alberto Elisavetsky. Over 200 registered participants – in addition to a large body of unregistered lurkers similar to that on the English-language side – participated in this section, mainly from South America.



And – what did they do there, anyway?


As always, participants spoke up in text-based discussion forums. All in all, Cyberweek saw participants voicing their thoughts in fifteen forums. Some of these were on themes that had been raised in previous Cyberweeks and ODR or ADR conferences, such as the role of trust in online negotiation and mediation, and ethics in ODR. Some new themes introduced in this year’s forum included the question of culture and diversity in online communication, the notion of translating the important roles played by apology and forgiveness to the online venue, ODR for organizational and workplace disputes and the feasibility of ODR taking hold in Latin America.



Participants were also offered opportunities to contribute and experience in other ways: Throughout the week, among other events, they participated in simulations organized and hosted by well-known ODR platforms The Mediation Room, Juripax and Smartsettle as well as LiSimba's cross-cultural communication simulation. and also in a contest sponsored by the ABA’s Section on Dispute Resolution focusing on ethics in ODR. Bill Warters produced a fantastic presentation on ODR’s history and development, using cutting-edge participatory technology that allowed any participant to add material on and enrich the presentation.



Anything new?


The main innovation this year was Cyberweek’s advance from teleconferencing to live-videoconferencing as the real-time interactive heart of the conference. In ten live webinars, participants engaged with leaders of the field and with each other – in full Technicolor, as the old TV ads used to say. This transition to incorporating visual real-time events made a tangible difference in Cyberweek’s interactions and dynamics (Jeff Thompson’s live webinar on using Web 2.0 for ADR practice, during last year’s Cyberweek, was the harbinger of this shift. You're a trendsetter, Jeff!). The webinars are archived and fully accessible on the Cyberweek homepage, so no matter what you were doing during Cyberweek, you can still see what I'm talking about.


In the webinars, it was easy to see how ODR is still a rapidly evolving field. The Internet Bar Organization’s presentation about using ODR for settling land disputes in Afghanistan, and for pre-empting music-rights disputes in Haiti is certainly not only a great example of this – it is also a challenge to everyone else out there to think of new venues and contexts for ODR. In a very creative expansion of the field, John DeBruyn brought together a group of online family mediators and a group of collaborative law practitioners to discuss how the methods used by the first group might be employed by the second to take collaborative practice online. The question ‘should / could online mediation be employed in family issue’, which I’ve certainly heard asked in the past, was left behind in the dust and unasked as these two groups of family dispute resolution experts discussed implementing online processes. Wrapping up the week with a closing webinar, Arthur Pearlstein challenged the field to find other ‘open spaces’ where traditional dispute resolution mechanisms – whether court or traditional ADR – cannot provide the goods, and to offer creative solutions through ODR.



What’s next?


Some very interesting initiatives are taking place as follow ups to Cyberweek. Some Cyberweek conversations are still going on, and the week’s entire content – forums, videoconferences and activities – are archived forever on ADRHub. Several groups of practitioners have expressed interest in keeping conversations going, or in forming permanent ‘groups’ on ADRHub for information, resource and idea –sharing. Other ripples include a group of practitioners who have undertaken to try out a variety of webconferencing platforms available on the market for free or for fee, in order to identify those most suitable to ODR. Got an idea for something like that? That’s what the Hub is for! Talk to us, we’ll help you set it up.


In addition, as I’ve already said – we’ll be using ADRHub.com for other conferences in the future. But right now, after weeks of late-night planning sessions and then a week of participating in Cyberweek with a time lag, some well earned rest for the Hub team! (Ordinarily, I don’t mind being 7-8 hours ahead of the States - but when webinars are scheduled for the evening US time, seven hours forward makes a big difference…).


All for now - Noam

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"What's Happening?" At ADRhub.com

Podcast Series Episode #8 Mediation, Interfaith, UNESCOCAT & Barcelona!
Join host Jeff Thompson and second time guest, The Rev. Chloe Breyer, Executive Director of the Interfaith Center of New York. They both give a recap of the Interfaith Center of New York's sponsored interfaith delegation trip to Barcelona.

The trip consisted of delegation members from NYC and Glasgow visiting Barcelona to learn how interfaith and conflict resolution work is be done there.
UNESCOCAT were our gracious hosts (Yes- I was lucky enough to attend as an official representative of the NYPD!).

We both discuss the work UNESCOCAT engages in (including the inter-religous dialogue, conflict resolution training...), the various groups we visited and important cultural elements which impacts the interfaith movement in Barcelona.







Will Mediators be the next to be fined? American football team the New York Jets will be fining star quarterback Mark Sanchez each time he slumps his shoulders, hangs his head down or trudges off the practice field.


...Now lets transition to the conflict resolution and mediation field. Of course it is silly to imagine (right?) something similar to be rolled out by the ABA or ACR but I think if anything, this is a reminder to us as mediators, ombudsman and coaches- supposedly communication experts- to be mindful of how we communicate other than the words we are using.


...Finally, something else to consider when being mindful of body language, both your own and others, is the Three C's- Congruence, Context and Clusters.
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School-Based Conflict Resolution Group
Pepsi Refresh Project - Vote for Grow 60 University/School Conflict Resolution Project in Fresno TODAY!!
The Morningside Center For Teaching Responsibilty Video
Newsletter Archives from School Mediation Associates



Eric Cissell- Since Cyberweek, I have had the opportunity to research different information and communication technology (ICT) platforms that were either designed or adopted to support peace-building efforts. The interest was sparked after participating in Jeff Aresty and Ruha Devanesan’s presentation on the Internet Bar Organization’s (IBO) Microcommerce Justice Initiatives. The IBO has successfully brought communities online to participate in the global marketplace first-

"This is not a time for compromise"....or is it?
Matthew Starman- For those of you who read my blogs (I think I'm up to 5 including my wife and mom) you may remember my blog about politics earlier. While I feel a little uncomfortable talking about politics, I feel compelled to talk about issues that relate to ADR. So I will write another.As the poll results were streaming in, I was reminded of a phrase I read by a representative from Ohio. "This is not a time for compromise." So I began to think to myself, 'why is compromise such a bad thing?' It see…

More News, Jobs & Events
One-Year Full-Time Instructor of Peace and Conflict Studies
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NJAPM Annual Conference - The Mediation Challenge: Thriving Through Change Employment Oppurtunities at the UN website
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Mediators To Be Fined For Body Language?

Will Mediators be the next to be fined?

American football team the New York Jets will be fining star quarterback Mark Sanchez each time he slumps his shoulders, hangs his head down or trudges off the practice field.

The most interesting thing about this unique fining system is it was not the front office or coaching staff that created this- it was Sanchez!

He has made it his goal this season to eliminate his negative body language and the fining system for infringements is a way for him to remain mindful of when negative gestures are performed.

Now lets transition to the conflict resolution and mediation field. Of course it is silly to imagine (right?) something similar to be rolled out by the ABA or ACR but I think if anything, this is a reminder to us as mediators, ombudsman and coaches- supposedly communication experts- to be mindful of how we communicate other than the words we are using.

A famous study tells us only 7% of our communication is done via the actual words being spoken while over 50% is through body language (38% is tone). Something I always remind people, especially when I am giving a training (yes, I give trainings on nonverbal communication and I welcome inquiries!) is that you have to be mindful of the "leakage" type gestures.

These adaptors, both self-adaptors and object adaptors , are gestures we do that is not intended to communication with others but rather it 'leaks' out. Think playing with your wedding ring while presenting (object adaptor) or rubbing/touching the back of your neck when you become uncomfortable (self-adaptor).


The photo on the left is an exaggeration of someone being bored but think for a moment- what is your body language saying when you are listening to one of the parties give their story? Are you 'showing' them you are listening? This picture shows the difference of your 'head on your hand' compared to your 'hand on your head'. The first gives off the impression usually of being bored while the second often displays interest and analysis.

Keep in mind also is the message you are giving (encoding) being received the way you intended it to be (decoded)?

Finally, something else to consider when being mindful of body language, both your own and others, is the Three C's- Congruence, Context and Clusters.

Congruence- If you are interested in what is being said, is your body showing this? Think of some ways that shows interest and disinterest.

Context- Think of the gestures you and others do in relation to the current situation.

Clusters- The best way to interpret and understand gestures is looking at combinations of the nonverbals being displayed along with what is being said. For example, if someone has there arms crossed across their chest. Are they also facing away, where is their eye contact, are they 'huffing' or sighing?

Looking at the cluster of gestures, which often will be subtle, helps you establish if the person is cold or being standoffish in the above example.

You do not need to fine yourself in order to be mindful of your body language. One thing I suggest often to people is practice. Most laptops come with webcams, so why not tape your opening statement and then review it to see what your body is saying? I recently conducted a small research on Christian Amanpour (formerly of CNN), host of ABC's This Week, to see what self adaptors she displayed after asking her panelists a question. The results are very interesting. See below for what I consider two drastic adaptors showing negative 'leakage' in photo one while I think photo two displays positive 'leakage'.

Enjoy and if you have any comments,remarks or questions, I happily await them!
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Podcast #8- Mediation, Interfaith & Barcelona!


Find more music like this on ADRhub Werner Institute

Episode #8


Mediation, Interfaith, UNESCOCAT & Barcelona!





Join host Jeff Thompson and second time guest, The Rev. Chloe Breyer, Executive Director of the Interfaith Center of New York. They both give a recap of the Interfaith Center of New York's sponsored interfaith delegation trip to Barcelona.



The trip consisted of delegation members from NYC and Glasgow visiting Barcelona to learn how interfaith and conflict resolution work is be done there. UNESCOCAT were our gracious hosts (Yes- I was lucky enough to attend as an official representative of the NYPD!).



We both discuss the work UNESCOCAT engages in (including the inter-religous dialogue, conflict resolution training and mediation), the various groups we visited and important cultural elements which impacts the interfaith movement in Barcelona.





Subscribe to the new series by click the image below:



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